Friday, May 23, 2008

Boring...and excited at the same time?

This is the time when I'm strap in the middle. See, I just came back from a party that don't feel like a party at all... How 'cool' is that?

So, I was all dressed up... and when I stepped into the venue,people were wearing smart casual while I was looking as if I was going to a prom night. The theme was ' Red, Black, and White'...so me and another friend of mine expected that we should be dressing up to the nines. Little do we know that we actually looked like peacocks at the party. I mean we really stood out.

So you see, I was not feeling in place. I still have glitter on my body! My goodness.. this is hell of an experience. And lol, this is what an inexperienced party goer would be which is to either be over-dress, or under-dress.Ha.

Then my bunch of friends and I was sitting there,looking at each other, drinking some beer and cruisers, looking at the projected big wide screen showing Wrestling. Then, there was the dance floor, which was empty and nobody was dancing. I was feeling like dancing but my friends are not gonna dance at all. Hrmm...So you know, I was feeling realli realli out of place.

After that, my friends were leaving...being all dressed up, I don't feel like going home straight after that. Luckily, our friend is gentlemen enough in fetching us to Hamilton to eat something. Of course, it was freezing. Then we went to Darby street for a cup of coffee. Still not bad for a night.But the party, I will never EVER be to a party like this anymore. Seriously... period.

Wednesday, April 02, 2008

Why?

How much fear do I have in me?
Why is my feelings hard to comprehend?
Why is there always a tug-of war in my heart?
Why do I feel not in place?
All these questions have been on my mind lately…
Why I’m building a wall to people around me?
Why am I talking to myself all the time, reflecting on my thoughts and actions? Good or bad?
I am starting to police myself in such a way, that I don’t feel like being myself anymore.
I am so tensed up around people… and I know somehow people can feel it…
When will I escape my own cage?
When….?

Monday, March 31, 2008

Feelings at the moment...

So fast, it is already half way through for first semester. At the mean time, I am getting used to the lifestyle here.

A person spend the most time with one self. And we as human beings will always have inner struggle of good and bad within us. And sometimes, I do find it difficult to maintain the balance. There are times when I will be very determined to do something. But there are times when I will be totally slacked. For instance, I was late to class today because I was watching You Tube and Crunchy Roll AGAIN till wee hours in the morning.After that, I called my mum and it seems that the house renovation is putting her under a lot of stress. It kinda feels bad when I am not around to help her.

Human connections are very interesting. Till now, it is still a myth to me. I don't even understand that how a person can affect my mood. Anyway, that is all for now.

Friday, February 01, 2008

Time...Home...Mummy...

Already 3am in the morning, but still I can't sleep... why? I really dunno.. This is the time when my brain is the most active, thoughts flowing all over the place, imagination running wild thinking nonsense stuff....

Sigh, I am still counting down my days back to Australia. But at least I am able to spend CNY 2008 with my family. Better then my neighbours, who complained that their daughters studying in UK couldn't celebrate CNY with them for many years.

What have I done in the past 2 months exactly?

Firstly, I was very excited to have a new pet- dog. Of course, I helped in bathing her, throwing away her smelly poo and pee, brush her hair, play with her, wipe her
\pee everytime she felt tooo excited playing with me (it never occurs when she is playing with my mum and bro, so I wonder whether my dog is a lesbian), wipe the tear staining under her eyes, bring her for evening walk...the list is long eh?

Secondly, maybe I spend my time shopping, reading, playing the piano.

Thirdly, I am going to shift to a new house soon.. so that is my biggest agenda here in Malaysia. Coz I have to decide and help my mum with the new design for the house and stuff.

Then I went to choir practice every weekend and spend most of my time driving. Accompany my mom to the bank, doing this and that...time just flies... why time is always not enough? I don't think I have done anything fascinating in my days in Malaysia.

Sounds boring right? But I think the most wonderful thing is that I am able to enjoy my mom's home cooked meal almost everyday. That,is really the BEST part.

Substituting western breakfast (toast with vegemite, fresh milk with cereals) with Wan Tan Mee, Dim Sum and nasi lemak is a blessing...

Able to go Yum Cha and chit chat with my friends at cafes or mamak stall during odd hours is also a blessing....

Damn I will MISS the FOOD here!!

I think the sole reason I would come back to Malaysia after my graduation would be for the food...How can I survive without mummy's food? Have to learn all the yummy recipes from my mum...I need her to be the mentor of my cooking...

You would never want to know what I cooked for myself when I was busy with assignments and exams. Instant noodles and Subway was inevitable.. Sometimes, I just threw in meat and vege to cook some sort of soup to eat with rice...Well, it just made me appreciate my mother's cooking more...

Not just cooking, I have to learn to be a 'Si Lai' ... In the sense that I need to go to the supermarket to buy my own groceries, have to think of how much vege and meat that I need to prepare one week's meal. Then, I have to learn to budget, compare prices of groceries. In Malaysia, I would leave to my mum to do the grocery shopping without thinking about the price..In other words, I think I would not even care to look at the price...

But now, I know it is not easy to do grocery shopping especially when you need to buy according to your budget and decide the brand of household products with reasonable pricing and quality before purchasing them.

Sigh, I would really miss home.. especially mummy... although we have arguments once in a while... But I think my mom's sacrifice for this house hold is very great...

Although I'm in my adulthood, I still have deep respect for my mum. In many ways, I am still my mother's biggest fan.

Think I am too long winded? If anyone read this post today, there is only three words I wanna say before going to bed.

'Love your mother'

GOOD NIGHT..ZZZZzzzZZzz

Wednesday, January 30, 2008

New Year 2008 and CNY...

Well.... it is going to be CNY soon.. Done your grocery shopping yet? Bought new clothes? Done spring cleaning yet? I've only done shopping to add clothes to my closet... You can say I'm a shopping queen...but not yet a shopaholic...haha... I think all girls love shopping...

Recently, I read a book on 'Why we want you to be rich' by Robert Kiyosaki and Donald Trump. It is daunting that we are involve in money everyday. But almost 90 % of people do not know how to invest their money or spend their lives working for money, safe money, live below your means and diversify by purchasing mutual funds...

Frankly speaking, how many of us really know about economics and about financial management? Most of us know how to spend or safe money rather than invest our money.

Since I will be working in the society for the next 2 years, it is scary of how little I know about money. I am not being materialistic, rather I am being realistic.
Therefore, it is very important to start now in educating ourselves everything about money. To people out there who always wanted to be rich, wealth is accumulated through time, effort and patience. Wealth do not grow overnight. So, stop being a dreamer and start taking action by investing in your financial education. The more you know, the less is the risk for investing.

I am learning now as well. Bachelor degree is just a ticket for us to thrive in this society. But, how well we wanna survive depends entirely on our extra efforts besides studies. So broaden your horizons, and do what you can when you have the time and energy. Leave no room for regrets and start taking action now.

So,this is my new year resolution-- Enhance my financial education.

It is your choice whether you want to change or continue living with ignorance.

That's all I wanted to say.

Hope this will shed some thoughts in some of you who came across my blog.

Monday, January 21, 2008

My new pet: Flaffy AKA Fifi

This is my new pet after I came back home! Don't think that she is cute when I first saw her... Not really a pet lover as well... But after a month or so spending precious moments with her.. She is soooo adorable!Now I will miss her badly when I am back in Australia. I have a new baby sis now, she is Fifi.. Haha... Enjoy her pictures.. and more pics to come.